Things I've Learned About Being a Mom

1. Toddlers will inevitably want your food, but not their own, so get used to eating food that is soggy from baby-saliva.


2. It's REALLY hard to teach your child not to do something when you are laughing at them.


3. Bodily fluids and excretions are no longer gross when dealt with daily.


4. Bedtime can also be known as "The threshold of Mommy's relaxation time".


5. Any object is a phone to a 20 month old.


6. Someone who rings your doorbell after your child's bedtime (even if it is 7pm) is a giant A-hole automatically.


7. Milestones like crawling, walking and talking are all so fun to think about before hand. After they actually happen you realize how easy you had it when they COULDNT run away from you or talk back!


8. Your children will always be the cutest, most beautiful, and most talented.


9. One of the hardest sounds in the world to hear is your child calling after you when you have to leave them.


10. Everything is more difficult, and yet more beautiful, with your children.